When my husband and I announced that we were pregnant for the second time, it’s almost as if people felt the need to reassure me of certain things, without having ever asked for reassurance in the first place.
If your first didn’t sleep don’t worry, your second one will. If you were able to breastfeed your daughter, it will be a breeze with your second. You’ll see, with the second you barely have time to make it to the hospital, he’s gonna come flying right out. Oh, you’re having a boy? That’s great! You’ll see boys are so much easier as babies than girls are. WTF??? I sincerely don’t know who I am more disappointed in. All these people who offered me this unsolicited, strange reassurance and advice, or myself for actually allowing myself to buy into this crap.
Let me go on record and state that NONE OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED IS TRUE! Not in any way, shape or form. So you can imagine my utter disappointment when I was in labor for far longer than the first time. When he refused to breastfeed after 5 weeks of failed attempts. When he did not sleep, much like my first. Or when I had to put him on medication at 3 weeks old because he had such awful refux he just screamed and threw up around the clock as if his life depended on it. Oh yah, boys are so much easier – said no one ever, except that one person who will never read this, and shall remain nameless.
When we hit the 4 month mark and I hadn’t slept more than 2 hours at a time, and he was still incessantly screaming his face off, I was on the edge of self destruction. I took to the internet and social media to find people going through similar experiences. I came across the usual mommy groups broken up into different categories, or youtube videos of screaming babies with reflux, amongst other horrible things. But what I didn’t find enough of were honest renditions of what desperate parents were going through.
Instead I came across hundreds of pages of picture perfect lives. Babies sitting unassisted at 3 months old. (seriously??) Parents feeding their kids and them loving every second of it. It got to the point where if I saw another post about a 3 week old sleeping through the night I was going to jail. None of this crap made me feel better about myself! I mean look at him! He’s cute and I love him to pieces….but baby boy is fucking miserable!
Funny story – not long ago, I had posted a picture of both my children on my person IG page. My daughter is brand rep for a local accessory company and I had been trying to get that perfect shot of her all damn morning. It wasn’t happening, to say the least. What I did get was a bunch of pictures that made it seem like I had a heathen child who hated me for bringing another human being into this world. So I decided to post the picture below anyways – Cute right? Not quite. She looks as if she is plotting her brothers demise….and did you happen to notice the baby has puke all over his face?? Well what I absolutely LOVE, is that two wonderful, Canadian companies decided to use this picture to promote their brands regardless. Babies and Bows and Olivia Rose I gotta hand it to you – being mothers yourselves, you clearly get what it is and were not afraid to show that not everything is about attaining the image of perfection. Take note!
So what I’m trying to get at here, is that nothing is ever as it seems – we all know this. But when we seek out hope in finding others “like us”, its hard to stay level headed about all this bullshit that has flooded Social Media.
My goal with this blog is to represent for all those parents in need of finding someone who gets it. Someone who has decided not to sugar coat this crazy life we live. To showcase the great things that come with having children, but also tell tales of the ridiculous shit life inevitably throws our way. So when that mother or father of two under two has had it with hearing about how perfect their friends kids are (trust me, they really aren’t – you just know that kid is gonna take a crap in his bath one of these days and eventually throw an epic tantrum at Costco on a Saturday) they come across this blog and find what I so desperately needed not so long ago.